Snow Boots in a Throne Room.
I search for You all morning. I watch how the light falls on everything.
Always looking to see…to really see.
Will You be in the red headed boy’s story, last nights dream, of ninja chipmunks….
in math problems accomplished easily…
in a weird story from the barn….
I glance out the window between the tea making and question answering.
I interrupt…”have you heard from God this morning?” to the boy with the vivid dreams
he blinks…and thinks, his fists still clenched defending his family from little ninjas,”nope just ninjas”
I nod…he continues.
I sip my tea and keep looking for You. I look out at the snow glazed field and know …just know…
I prepare a way.
I tuck each child into their lessons or chores.
I situate the toddler with snacks and drink, her favorite show
I zip up my boots….to slip away…to really search… Somedays you must wear boots to get to the throne room.
Because I know that nothing is worth not receiving and I am built to receive.
I sit on the edge of a throne room and yet I run spiritually toward something…
I want to gather and collect whatever You have, like always but always new
I am so hard on myself as I sit there…Why am I so easily distracted.
“such a noisy bird must be huge… I have to see what it is…” only to find the huge raucous is a tiny angry wren…. I guilt myself for spiritually stepping out for this….
So I sit and get determined …. determined to not stop…I bring those names that He speaks to me...those names He takes the time to bring to me again and again….I lift those up…I pray for Peaceful Learning…my husband…
I open just one eye…watching the grass clump move back and forth with it’s little visitor…
I click my camera on…
I squeeze my eyes tight…so tight…stay on task, no distractions…
Bless my family this day….let us understand things we never knew before…let us gather everything you have for us…
my eyes open now and I watch the grass shift and I sit deflated that I am so easily distracted…
I sit there and give myself a hard time.
I think how I will talk to others about this….this easily distracted and how to overcome.
Such a sad thing we can’t stay on task…that I can’t stay on task.
I keep watching the invisible distraction as it shakes the blades of grass.
I don’t want this little thing to come into my house with the seasons changing…true statement on so many levels…I keep chiding myself… and then…
So loud over head.
like a shadow of a man with wings, briefly flys over me
landing across from me high up
and again the sound that cracks the silence and all other birds go silent
all of those distractions stop…
the whole field more frozen then it was a moment ago.
my camera already on…all the settings ready to go…
He really does see us through a filtering lens of Grace…gifts for us…just be willing to show up to gather all that He has for you!
*On a personal (backstory) note….I have seen this bald eagle a few times… but no one ever believes me and I haven’t had my camera with me…odd but true. We don’t really have bald eagles around here…The bald eagles normally nest near the river. The one other time I took a picture of a bald eagle was at the beach and it was so blurry, because I didn’t expect it to just be sitting there when I walked out onto the beach…Note to self; When you tell God you are there to gather…be ready!~T